One of the most difficult parts of how to hookup online is talking to some girl you’ve never meant about the possibility of sex without sounding like a complete creep. Some of this etiquette is just the same in the Vancouver bar scene as it is online, but it can be difficult to pin down when you can’t follow her reactions and she can’t hear your tone of voice. Something that may have worked just find in person can come across like a stalker over the Internet, so it may be best to reconsider standard lines and approaches even if you’ve had some success in person. You should go for some online dating tips. Read our hookup online strategies and guide to make sure that you do not sound like a creep online.
Actually Introduce Yourself
Even on websites made for no other purpose than to hookup online, how you approach a potential playmate can make all the difference. This is especially true when it comes to introductions. In person, interrupting a conversation or joining a group and buying her a drink are all easy ways to insert yourself into her awareness that don’t require introducing yourself first. Unfortunately you can do none of these things online. Hookup websites are a dime a dozen and she will already be wary no matter how interested she is in a one night stand, casual sex or no strings attached dating. Why? Well to put it simply, when we go online for a hot date, our worst worries involve whether or not she looks as good as her photo and if she’ll change her mind. Her worst fear on the other hand is ending up dead in a gutter. You can see why she might shy away from people that start the conversation telling her how good she’d look in bed.
So actually introduce yourself. It might seem silly, but she’ll feel a lot more comfortable with you if you even give half a second of warning by saying hello first and even just giving some vaguely identifiable information. It doesn’t even have to be your name, just your gender and sexual preference is usually enough to be considered polite for any online dating site. Instead of going right into how hot she looks, tell her what caught your eye in her profile and why you that interested you. This is especially true if you’re actually looking to date and not just for a good lay, since most women equate the word “hot” with the idea of a guy expecting sex and may not be willing to do that if that’s not the sort of site she signed up on.
Ditch the Macho Act
Okay, we get it, showing off a bit and establishing ourselves is kind of how we operate, and while that might work when we have a debonair smile and the muscles to back it up in person, remember that online all we’ve got is a bunch of text and maybe a couple of still pictures. She can’t hear our voice on our profile page and no how to hookup online guide is going to tell you how much of a problem that really it, but take our word for it, macho doesn’t work in text form. In fact, it comes off less manly and more stupid man-child than anything. If she made it to your profile and she’s responding to you, she knows what’s between your legs and has at least some appreciation for whatever you showed her in your profile picture (hopefully something higher up). There’s no reason to shove it in her face, and you be sure she won’t respond as well if you do.
Have an Actual Conversation
This is the sort of how to that applies less to a hookup online and more to finding someone to date online, but depending on the reputation you’re looking to build, is worthwhile either way. You see, it doesn’t matter if you’re in Vancouver or Calgary, most women you encounter are going to be a lot more open to someone who can throw a coherent sentence together than someone essentially grunting at them in text form. It may not seem like much, but even when just hooking up for the night, taking a second to ask her opinion on where you want to meet up and asking if you need to make time for travel arrangements is more than enough to make her feel more like she’s speaking with another human being and not just a warm dildo for the evening.
Of course when it comes to actually dating, this is even more important. Actually having a conversation when you first contact each other can be the difference between actually meeting her for a date or not. Don’t try to impress her, especially not in text. You’re both on a dating website for a reason. The fact that she replied at all shows some interest already. The way to keep it is by engaging her and show her that you think she is worth taking to and getting to know. Telling her about the part of her profile that really stood out and made you want to contact her. Do you share a favorite food, or grow up in the same area? Did she list a hobby you have as well? Talk about that. Ask about her favorite things. If you share the hobbies, ask what got her into it. If she shares a story, reply with a story. Equal disclosure is a key part of building rapport.
There’s no perfect guide for how tohookup online, but there’s a lot to be said for dating and even just for standing out when you want to find someone for the evening. Most of it comes down to etiquette and what we like to call being a decent human being. Women know they have the numbers advantage on any dating or sex related website out there. They are more than willing to use that to their advantage and will rather ruthlessly eliminate contenders based on an initial impression or mild slip up. Why not? She can afford to keep waiting because it won’t be long before someone else sends her a message and if he’s a smidgen more of a gentleman, chances are he’s going to land the date and you’ll be home by yourself again.
Don’t let the missing body language, and lack of tone tell a story that’s simply not true. You may be her perfect match, but if it seems like you’re not willing to talk with her instead of at her and are more interested in how she fits your criteria and how well you think you would both get on, she’s going to move on to the next guy with a single click of the mouse. It’s not about how you actually are, but how you come across in text. That’s why full sentences and asking questions are a must. Not only does this make it easier for her to understand what you’re saying and reply to it, but it also shows some thought and effort into your interactions with her. If you’re a slow typist, just tell her in the beginning, and she’ll even wait for your replies, allowing you more time to craft the perfect response.